I Trust You
(A Notebook Dedication)
I’ve been fearing these pages for weeks now,
but I think it’s time to face them.
Waste them on short poetry lines.
Because I don’t think I have ever been so afraid of change
as I am now.
I have never been so scared
to finish a notebook,
to start a new one.
Well then I was much less happy
than I am now.
I wanted things to change, for goodness sake!
And now I am tired
of constantly finding different directions.
I want to settle in
to an endless stream of paper and blissful imagination.
But alas, I know that’s not the case…
I mean, things change.
And even if we’re constantly begging for something new we still wish we could live
in the past.
I suppose I should just get used to it.
But how do I do that
without making myself
The lines are running out
and I know that I won’t find my answer
But girl, you have always been smart.
You have always been very, very strong
ever since you wrote your first note,
did your first crazy thing,
found the person you wanted to become.
And no matter what you do,
I trust you
to do what is necessary to bring you joy.
I will always fear the future.
I will always fear time.
I will always fear love and the loss of it.
But I refuse to fear myself.
And I know that this story is exactly as long as you want it.